Menopause and Me

It's World Menopause Day and the theme for 2024, according to the International Menopause Society, is hormone therapy. There is so much controversy just now over the use of HRT, its availability and its prescription and so I thought I might add my own thoughts for good measure.

I'm 60 and post menopausal, when I was peri-menopausal and into the menopause itself, I had just moved back from living in Cyprus into a house that was too small, too old and in the middle of a town - not ideal. My husband remained in Cyprus. I was on my own in Sussex with 2 teenagers who were trying to adjust to life in the UK after a very unconstrained life abroad immersed in a gentle, generous culture, and older kids who were also working out how they were going to live here. Additionally I had ageing parents to support. To feel secure I needed to turn my little cottage industry into a business to support my family. It was tough. I struggled. A lot. It was the perfect storm that so many women face, teenage kids, older parents, demanding work and suddenly the resources needed to manage it all feel far out of reach.

For me, menopause was far more of a mental/emotional roller coaster than a strongly physical experience. I had periods of time that felt absolutely fine and then quite manic, my temper was variable, I was up and down and felt exhausted and frequently overwhelmed. My sleep was shocking and I'd often wake in the night in a cold sweat, consumed by anxiety - the 3am catastrophising. The one thing that made me feel consistently better was walking the dogs and being by the sea, which somehow absorbed all the stress and strain, leaving me calm. The sea is the place that offers me respite, it always has been.

I didn't take HRT, I used Homeopathy, herbs and Bach and Bush Flower Essences when things got grim to very good effect. I had no objection to growing older, no worries about the physical changes that were taking place but I needed help with anxiety and stress. 

I understand why HRT feels like such a good option, it seems to offer a route back to yourself when everything is uncertain and challenging. There is no doubt that for many women it is the difference between managing symptoms and not. If you want it, you should be able to have it.

Menopause however, is far more than questions of HRT, whatever you choose to do, it is a huge time of transition, the change from potential child bearer to wise woman. It's a seismic shift but it can, in the end, be incredibly empowering, Through the journey, I have finally become myself, the anxiety has subsided, I know my purpose, I live where I can achieve what I set out to do. I have surrounded myself with the things that make me well and discarded so much of the rest.

As my skin changed I made products to suit it - these now form the Harris Edition - as my moods fluctuated I sought the remedies and supplements to help - Sepia was a game changer for me, indicated when everything feels too much, when your temper is frayed, when you feel worn out and cross.

When I felt anxious I made a balm to ease the torment, this became the Calm & Tranquil Balm, I made the Wildflower Tea to ease the flushes along with a well chosen remedy - homeopathy and herbs are really good for hot flushes. I took Vitamin D to help weather the winters and I now take the Heartease Tincture to keep the peace.

With all of this in my survival toolkit I have gingerly crept out the other side, better, stronger and knowing myself a lot more. It hasn't been easy, but actually for me, it has offered a transformation that has allowed me to do really wonderful work with a great group of people, living in a place where the sea is the first thing i see from my bedroom window and, as I step out every day, I can taste the salt on my lips and hear the waves lapping on the beach by my house. From my little island home, wherever you are in this process of change, I wish you strength, peace and a warm welcome to the wise woman you will undoubtedly become.

(I can't reply to comments on this platform but I read every one and appreciate them massively.)